See the world through my eyes
My name is Saar. I’m 17 years old and I’m autistic. I live with my mother, my older sister and my dog, Maple.
I never quarreled with my family and the relationship between me and my sister are very close. She teaches me many new things and I really love hanging out with her. Sometimes I feel a bit different from other children because it is hard for me to form long sentences. I go to a special school with other autistic pupils like me.
Like many other boys my age I like to play football and ride a bicycle. I also play the piano, love painting, and enjoy hanging out with my friends. I love listening to classical music, operas and song in Hebrew. I don’t watch the program “The Big Brother” because they are just talking there all the time and it bores me but I never miss the programs “Israeli Idol” and “Dancing with the Stars” and I have all the c.d’s of all the seasons.
My class has only eight students in it and each student learns at his own pace the subjects he loves. Sometimes, when I look at people, I see they make strange movements with their faces and I do not understand what that means. I can’t tell when someone is sad or happy, scared or excited and I don’t always know how to behave and what is acceptable and what is not and I have to learn everything from scratch. I really try to remember how to behave correctly, but sometimes I forget. Occasionally I hear a sound that really hurts my ears and I have to put my hands over my ears in order to stop the pain. I have to try hard in order to understand people I don’t know because their voice sounds a bit different from what I’m used to. When people look me in the eyes it confuses me and I lose my concentration and stop listening to what they are saying. I like things to be neat and organized. If my mother assures me that we are going to a certain place or we have to do something on a certain day, I’m very annoyed if our plans are suddenly changed without telling me beforehand. Last year I discovered that there is a girl at my school that I really like. I think she’s my girlfriend because every morning I have to greet her good morning before I start my day, we play together on the computer, travel together by bus and I am holding her hand tight and look out for her. I’m not allowed to take the bus or walk around alone because I can get confused and lose my way, so my mother takes me to all my social activities.
I know I’m a little different, but each one of us is a little different than the other. My dream is to play the piano before a big audience because I love when people applaud my performance. I also hope that one day when I grow up I’ll be able to draw a more beautiful world.